CAUGHT CHEATING WITH MY BEST FRIEND’S HUSBAND: AM I WRONG?

Am I wrong for falling in love with my best friend’s husband? I’m Joan, 54, and the man in question is Bob, who’s 56.

This mess started about six months ago. I’ve been a widow for five years, and loneliness can really eat at you. My best friend, Marie, and her husband, Bob, have been my support through thick and thin. Over time, Bob and I started spending more time together, especially since Marie’s new job required her to travel frequently.

At first, it was just coffee after our morning jogs, then it turned into breakfast, and eventually, dinners when Marie was out of town. I won’t make excuses—it was a slippery slope, and we both fell hard.

One evening, Marie came home unexpectedly. She found us together—too close, in a moment that was undeniably intimate. The look on her face was something I’ll never forget. Betrayal. Hurt. Anguish.

Marie and I have been friends since college. She’s the godmother to my children, and now, I fear I’ve ruined a decades-long friendship over a relationship that should never have started. Bob insists that he loves me and wants to leave Marie, but the guilt is overwhelming.

I’ve tried reaching out to Marie, but she won’t speak to me. I understand her anger and her pain, and I’m so ashamed of the hurt I’ve caused. This wasn’t just a fling; feelings are involved, but it doesn’t excuse the betrayal.

Now, I’m caught between the man I’ve grown to love and the friendship I value deeply. I never intended for anyone to get hurt, especially not Marie.

Am I wrong for wanting to find happiness, or is it too selfish to pursue this relationship at the cost of my best friend’s marriage?